Day 4 - Fasting

Today was quite interesting. The first 'fasting' day. I could only drink water. I began it last night after dinner and ended it today with a lite meal. To be honest, I lost focus of God for awhile. I was hungry, and irritable, and just overall annoyed with the world. Not to mention that yesterday I tried to eat meals broken up into smaller meals throughout the day so that I could eat right up to when I started the fast. I'm not sure that's what God wants. My motives were wrong. This morning my heart was wrong. I moped around the house and complained of how hungry I was and my thoughts on many things that annoyed me. It finally took my sister stopping me and telling me to go read the Bible, pray, and fill up on Jesus before I remembered that I was supposed to be doing that. Self-centered? Yeah. I wonder if Setting Captives Free has a course on getting rid of an addition to Self. Needless to say, I dragged my feet for another 10 minutes before I even bothered to try.

Then God caught a hold of me. I believe that's called 'conviction.'

At first I tried to read a few verses and call that enough. Nope. I didn't do the trick. I didn't feel better. Then I prayed for a minute to see if that would work. Ah, maybe a lil something...guilt?...but still not enough. Finally I decided to just read the beginning of today's lesson so I could feel like I tried, and then go watch TV to make the day pass faster. That's horrible, I know, but I wanted you to know the depth of my selfishness and laziness. Finally, as I started doing the lesson and studying God's word, I couldn't stop. I didn't want to stop. It was talking about fasting and what that really means; the wrong way (which I was doing) and the right way, according to scripture. It was then that I realized how far off track I had gotten. Praise God for his mercy and love! Seriously. Afterwards I went and spent more time with God through reading about his suffering and worshipping him through music. And he did make me feel better. Not that the stomach pains or light-headedness went away so much, but that my focus was taken off of myself.

When it was time to eat dinner, I got a little in a bowl. A piece of chicken, corn, and plain rice never tasted so good! I am thankful to God for using my sister to get me to look to him. I am thankful for his forgiveness. I am thankful for the Holy Spirit softening my heart and convicting me of my sin. I am so thankful for Jesus Christ suffering sooooooooooo much more so that I and others can be freed from our bondages, including overeating. Praise God. For real.

And pray for me.